Greg & Laile DeWeese

Continual Repentance

Thou hast imputed my sin to my Substitute,

     and hast imputed His righteousness to my soul,

                   clothing me with a bridegroom’s robe,

                   decking me with jewels of holiness.

But in my Christian walk I am still in rags;

         my best prayers are stained with sin;

         my penitential tears are so much impurity;

         my confessions of wrong are so many aggravations of sin;

         my receiving the Spirit is tinctured with selfishness.

I need to repent of my repentance;

I need my tears to be washed;

I have no robe to bring to cover my sins,

     no loom to weave my own righteousness;

I am always standing clothed in filthy garments,

      and by grace am always receiving change of raiment,

      for Thou dost always justify the ungodly;

I am always going into the far country,

     and am always returning home as a prodigal,

     always saying, Father, forgive me.

     and Thou are always bringing forth the best robe.

Every morning let me wear it,

       every evening return in it,

       go out to the day’s work in it,

       be married in it,

       be wound in death in it,

       stand before the great white throne in it,

       enter heaven in it shining as the sun.

Grant me never to loose sight of

        the exceeding sinfulness of sin,

        the exceeding righteousness of salvation,

        the exceeding glory of Christ,

        the exceeding beauty of holiness,

        the exceeding wonder of grace.

The Dark Guest

Bend my hands and cut them off,

         for I have often struck Thee with a wayward will,

         when these fingers should embrace Thee by faith.

I am not yet weaned from all created glory,

     honour, wisdom, and esteem of others,

      for I have a secret motive to eye my name in all I do.

Let me not only speak the word sin, but see the thing itself.

Give me to view a discovered sinfulness,

             to know that though my sins are crucified

                they are never wholly mortified.

Hatred, malice, ill-will,

  vain-glory, that hungers for and hunts after

     man’s approval and applause,

   all are crucified, forgiven,

       but they rise again in my sinful heart.

O my crucified but never wholly mortified sinfulness!

O my life-long damage and daily shame!

O my indwelling and besetting sins!

O the tormenting slavery of a sinful heart!

Destroy, O God, the dark guest within

       whose hidden presence makes my life a hell.

Yet Thou hast not left me here without grace;

The cross still stands and meets my needs

         in the deepest straits of the soul.

I thank Thee that my remembrance of it

      is like David’s sight of Goliath’s sword

           which preached forth Thy deliverance.

The memory of my great sins, my many temptations, my falls,

        bring afresh into my mind the remembrance

          of Thy great help, of Thy support from heaven,

          of the great grace that saved such a wretch as I am.

There is no treasure so wonderful

       as that continuous experience of Thy grace toward me

          which alone can subdue the risings of sin within:

Give me more of it.

From "The Valley of Vision," a collection of Puritan prayers and meditations

Yet I Sin

Thou are good beyond all thought,

My lips are ready to confess, but my heart is slow to feel,

      and my ways reluctant to amend.

I bring my soul to Thee;

      break it, wound it, bend it, mould it.

      that I may hate it, abhor it, flee from it.

My faculties have been a weapon of revolt against Thee;

       and served the foul adversary of Thy kingdom.

Give me grace to bewail my insensate folly,

Grant me to know that the way of transgressors is hard,

                             that to depart from Thee is to lose all good.

I have seen the purity and beauty of Thy perfect law,

                  the happiness of those in whose heart it reigns,

                     yet I daily violate and condemn its precepts.

Thy loving Spirit strives within me,

                         speaks in startling providences,

                         allures by secret whispers,

                           yet I choose devices and desires to my own hurt,

                                      and provoke Him to abandon me.

All these sins I mourn, lament, and for them cry pardon.

Work in me more profound and abiding repentance;

Give me the fullness of a godly grief that trembles and fears,

        which is ever powerful, and ever confident;

       the brightness and glories of the saving cross.

From "The Valley of Vision," a collection of Puritan prayers and meditations

Self-Knowledge

It is a good day to me when Thou givest me

Sin is my greatest evil,

I have cause to loathe myself,

   And not to seek self-honour,

My country, family, church

   Fare worse because of my sins,

   For sinners bring judgment in thinking sins are small,

Let me not take other good men as my example,

For all good men are not so good as Thou desirest,

            Are not always consistent,

            Do not always follow holiness,

Show me how to know when a thing is evi

            Which I think is right and good,

            How to know when what is lawful

            Comes from an evil principles

Give me grace to recall my needs,

            My lack of knowing Thy will in Scripture,

                          Of wisdom to guide others,

                          Of daily repentance, want of which keeps Thee at bay,

                          Of the spirit of prayer, having words without love,

                          Of zeal for Thy glory, seeking my own ends,

                          Of joy in Thee and Thy will,

And let me not lay my pipe too short of the fountain,

                          Never touching the eternal spring,